So You Bought A Blu-Ray?

Out of curiosity, I decided to compile a list of all of the (wildly successful) proprietary Sony formats. I can hardly make it through this list without peeing myself with laughter.

· BetaMax (1975)
· Mini-Disc (1991)
· Memory Stick (1998)
· HiFD (1998)
· Digital8 (1999)
· ATRAC (1999)
· Super Audio CD (1999)
· Universal Media Disc (2004)
· Hi-MD (2004)
· Blu-ray Disc (2006)

Wow, it's like a museum of failure.

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
-George Santayana-

Iconography

I'm making this offer half drunk and wholly serious. I'm noticing that the entirety of the D-Town contingency has either no or half-assed Blogger icons.
If anyone wants me to do a custom photo shoot/Photoshop session while I'm back, I'd be happy to do you the favor free of any charge (I may drink some and/or all of your liquor-stuffs in the process, but that's incidental). I'll have my laptop and some time to kill, so if anyone wants a custom icon let me know.
And to clarify before everyone starts asking; only one of you can use WilliamT's naked ass as an online avatar - Bill has first shot at that one.

Monumental Journey

Yesterday I got a wild hair and decided to wander around the National Mall and take some photos for Flickr. Granted, it probably wasn't the best idea to go out in the middle of the day in 90 degree heat and wander around for over three hours, but If I wasn't gonna do it who would?
You think you've got what it takes? Well, here's the route (approx. 8 miles):I started at Union Station, walked down to the Capitol, down Independence Ave. past the museums, around the Department of Agriculture, up to the Mall, around the Washington monument, over to the WWII memorial, down the reflecting pool to the Lincoln memorial, went inside and around the Lincoln Memorial, for some unknown reason decided to walk over to Virginia and back across the Arlington bridge, went over to the Vietnam memorial, over to the Einstein Memorial, and then (apparently overcome by heat exhaustion) decided to walk another 15 blocks up to the Big Hunt (aka: The Drinkin' Memorial) for a few beers.
Those "few" beers turned out to be 8 beers and one shot in the span of 90 minutes.
I then took the subway back home, fixed dinner, and switched on the Cubs game. I fell asleep sometime during the 1st inning. I woke up just in time for the post-game, and then spent the rest of the evening trying (in vain) to get back to sleep.
Dammit.

Here's some highlights:
I was meeting up with a friend for lunch at Union Station, so I decided that afterwards I would stop by the Capitol and then wander around the Mall area to get some shots for my Flickr page. The one thing I really wanted to get was a shot of the US Department of Agriculture building. A couple of months ago I was walking past when I noticed this: It's part of the facade and predates WWII, but I wondered how many of thousands of people had walked by that building every day and never noticed the details. I had to get it.
While walking past the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum I noticed these awesome chili peppers used for decorative landscaping. I'm so freakin' jealous. I have 6 sickly pepper plants that are on death's door and those rocket huggin' sons of bitches down at the Smithsonian have hundreds of beautiful fully-loaded plants that are just being used for decoration. Fuckers.

I had to visit the Einstein Memorial, but all I could think while I was there was "cousin-fucker". Damn you, Ed.

All-in-all, It was a pretty damned fine day. For way-more pictures click over to my Flickr page.
Enjoy.

W-R-O-N-G (Everyone's Accusing Me)

I just learned today that I was way-wrong on my plans for Illinois this August.
Today my dad asked me if I could haul back a bunch of random crap from DC to IL. By "ask", I mean "told me". He's payin' for the gas.

Now it looks like I'll be back in the Illin'noise from sometime around the 8th of August all the way through the 20th or so. At least that's how it looks right now. Break out the drinkin' shoes, D-Town.

Anyone know how to get a refund on a non-refundable airline ticket?

More 'John From Cincinnatti' Crap

Okay, I've been totally obsessed with this show. A couple of things I recently realized/discovered while poking around on the internets:
a) Half of the fucking cast is from Deadwood (sans funny facial hair). I knew they looked familiar.
b) I'm revising my initial theory on John's origin. I no longer think he's the messiah - I'm pretty sure that he's God.
I knew that John's last name (Monad) seemed familiar, so I hit Wikipedia for some answers this is what I found:

Monad (apophatic theology)

In many Gnostic systems (and heresiologies), God is known as the Monad, the One, The Absolute, Aion teleos (The Perfect Æon), Bythos (Depth or Profundity, Βυθος), Proarkhe (Before the Beginning, προαρχη), and E Arkhe (The Beginning, η αρχη). God is the high source of the pleroma, the region of light. The various emanations of God are called æons.

Within certain variations of Gnosticism, especially those inspired by Monoimus, the Monad was the highest God which created lesser gods, or elements (similar to æons).

According to Hippolytus, this view was inspired by the Pythagoreans, who called the first thing that came into existence the Monad, which begat the dyad, which begat the numbers, which begat the point, begetting lines, etc. This was also clarified in the writings of Plato, Aristotle and Plotinus. This teaching being largely Neopythagorean via Numenius as well.

This Monad is the spiritual source of everything which emanates the pleroma, and could be contrasted to the dark Demiurge (Yaldabaoth) that controls matter.

The Sethian cosmogony as most famously contained in the Apocryphon ('Secret book') of John describes an unknown God, very similar to the orthodox apophatic theology, although very different from the orthodox credal teachings that there is one such god who is identified also as creator of heaven and earth. In describing the nature of a creator god associated with Biblical texts, orthodox theologians often attempt to define God through a series of explicit positive statements, themselves universal but in the divine taken to their superlative degrees: he is omniscient, omnipotent and truly benevolent. The Sethian conception of the most hidden transcendent God is, by contrast, defined through negative theology: he is immovable, invisible, intangible, ineffable; commonly, 'he' is seen as being hermaphroditic, a potent symbol for being, as it were, 'all-containing'. In the Apocryphon of John, this god is good in that it bestows goodness. After the apophatic statements, the process of the Divine in action are used to describe the effect of such a god.

Plus, The symbol that he keeps tracing with his foot looks like the Monad symbol with a line connecting the perimeter to the radius.

Monad Symbol

Interesting huh?

State Fair Warning

Due to circumstances beyond my control, it looks like my annual August journey back to IL is a no-go. Instead I'll be doing a quick weekend barnstorming tour of Chicago on the 17th, 18th, and 19th of August.
So far, I've got something on the 18th but the rest is wide-open. There's an off-chance that I might make it out to D-Town for one night, but it's very unlikely.

Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

Notes On A Quagmire -or- IROC-Zeesh

I've been meaning on doing this post for a long while now. I've held off on doing any "hot" issues for awhile out of caution. I really didn't want anything I posted up on this stupid blog to queer my chances of finding a job, but now I just don't give a wet shit.
So, here you go - look for more repressed posts in the coming days and weeks.
Stop and take a good look at the picture above - Click on it (to enlarge) and really look at it.
I'll wait.
It's a painting by Sandow Birk. It was featured in LA Weekly a few months ago, and it depicts the neo-cons vision of being greeted as liberators by the Iraqis. Great, huh? I think that we all wish that this was the reality on the ground over there, but it's not (with one exception - more later).

I've fucking hated this war from the get-go. The human losses involved in such an incursion are a damned shame, but the obvious financial detriment that this war would cost the US is fucking criminal. Our economy is teetering on the brink of ruin with the imminent retirement of the baby-boomers. The last thing this country needs is more deficits. I never bought into the "oil revenue" argument, and the last thing I wanted was our country indebted to rebuild yet another third-world shithole and police its streets. No nation building. Remember that?

Don't get me wrong, I'm no Birkenstock clad daisy picker. I was one of the few people that would have had zero problem if the US dropped ye olde atom bomb on Osama in the Afghanistan conflict. Fuck 'em. Human life is cheap - Ground wars are expensive. Just turn all of their sand into glass and rename the whole wasteland the "Vengeance Memorial".
Since the Ruskies folded up their war booth, we have a shitload of thermo-nuclear goodies that Nevada just won't let us bury. Just as well get some use out of 'em, and leave Nevada to worry about unlicensed whores and card-counters. Done and done.

I saw Iraq as a fool's-errand and detrimental to achieving our goals in Afghanistan. I was amazed that ALL of the news outlets were cheerleading this war from the onset. I never watch Fox, but MSNBC and CNN both had "countdown to war" counters running. Any dissent to the inevitable war was often overwhelmed with extended commentary on how there was no other option. Roll the flag graphic and sell the war.
The one example of this that really sticks with me is the media's treatment of Scott Ritter in the run-up to the war. If you don't remember, he was the former US weapons inspector in Iraq. He was the military guy with a buzz-cut claiming that there were no WMDs in Iraq. Remember? Right before the war he was on every news network pleading not to intervene militarily. He was ignored and slandered. That guy went from being a military consultant for Fox News to being branded as a traitor (and later pedophile) by his own circle. He was derided by his former employer as being on Sadam's payroll, and was largely dismissed by everyone else.
He was right.
I haven't heard word one from that guy since the early days of this war. I'm amazed that he hasn't cashed in on his Cassandraesque prescience. If I was in his shoes, right now I'd be holding Cindy Sheehan's hand with my right hand and my new 'told-you-so' book in my left. The singular fact that he hasn't cashed in on this whole fiasco just goes to reinforce his initial motivations. He was trying like hell to keep us out of a stupid fucking pointless war.
He failed.

Historically, every single fucking conflict with the third-world has ended poorly. Ask the Brits. Shit, ask the US government. Any serious war that wasn't a regional land-grab has been an abject failure. Hell, we provided Iraq with munitions in their war with Iran after the latter grabbed hostages from our embassy, and we brought the fucking Taliban into power to repel the Soviets. The whole fucking region is a god-damned worthless hornets nest. Oil may be a lubricant, but we're the ones getting fucked - Hard. If I wanted to fight to the death with backwards fanatics, I'd wander drunk and naked into a fundamentalist church again. Forget that.
The smart move would have been to give Israel carte-blanc to deal with this issue. The reason that Iraq had no WMDs? Because ISRAEL kept bombing out all of their nuclear/biological warfare installations going back to 1981.

This whole fucking oil-run has turned into the most embarrassing debacle for the US in the last century. We're paying more than ever for gasoline and we get stuck chaperoning a civil war. It's the equivalent of running out to the corner-store for a quart of milk and returning with full-blown herpes.
So what's gonna happen? Here's the deal: Regardless of what we do, or when we leave, the region is going to (roughly) split back into the three former Ottoman vilayets of Mosul, Baghdad, and Basra that existed before the post WWI British occupation. The Sunni faction will ally with Syria, the Shi'ah faction will ally with Iran, and the Kurds will probably be subjugated by Turkey.
Kurdistan in the north (formerly Mosul) is the one shining ray of hope in the region. If you go into any cafe in Kurdistan they have a portrait of George W. hanging right above the register like DiMaggio in a pizzeria. They have a booming free-market emerging, and are true proponents of representative democracy. Everybody fucking hates them - They're doomed.

The bottom line: Now we've lost many more Americans in Iraq than we did on 9/11. We've destroyed the global sympathy that was generated after that tragedy. We've allowed Al Queda to escape into Pakistan, replenish its ranks, and have bankrolled their enlistment campaign. We've made our great country enemy #1 of the hamophobics. And, most importantly, we've flushed a metric ass-load of money right down the shitter just so George Bush could finally out-stupid our last Texan president , LBJ.

WMD is the new Gulf of Tonkin. God bless America.

Ha Ha Ha

DeKalb is for lovers.
From CNNmoney.com

L&E Record Geek Public Service Listing #4

Greedy Boot 1 - 2005: Various Artists
Okay, I've had this damned comp for well over year now and I think that I've finally gotten the track listing figured out.
This is an "outtakes" album of Dwarves songs, Dwarves side projects, and other tracks that are somehow tangentially related to the Dwarves. Any sane person would just list all the tracks as "Dwarves" and move on, but not me.
The artists are listed together above the track listing as so:

Dwarves,Mondo Generator, Greedy Bros, Cool Millions, Persephone's Bees, Sgt. Saltpeter, Brad Cook, DJ Marz, Luke Sick, Holograms, Coyote Ridge, Dexter, Elmo, KEZF, The Fursmen and Blag Dahlia

Easy right? Just match the names to the appropriate tracks? Considering that Blag sings on all but a handful of the 20 tracks on this record and half the artists seem to be dead leads, not so easy.
Here's my annotated track listing. If I'm off on any of these, feel free to correct me.

ACHTUNG: Almost all of the links (with corresponding cover art) are NSFW.

1: Drinking Up Christmas - Dwarves
This is a holiday themed re-recording of "Better Be Women" off of their 1997 album The Dwarves Are Young And Good Looking. I have a sneaking suspicion that this might be the elusive 'Fursmen' track (Dwarves under a pseudonym), but all listings I have been able to find identify this one as by the Dwarves. I haven't been able to locate the original release of this track, so I'm sticking with what I know.

2: Kaotica - DJ Marz
This one was originally released as the B-Side for the Dwarves Salt Lake City 7" EP. The credit on the original is listed as "Produced, Mixed & Recorded By Blag Dahlia, Bradley Cook, DJ Marz & the Greedy Bros." Almost all internet searches credited this one to DJ Marz and it definitely sounds like a remix, so I'm going with that one even though it was originally released under the Dwarves banner.

3: Massacre (Clean) - Dwarves
This is a radio edit of the track from The Dwarves Must Die. Originally released (in this form) on The Dwarves Must Remix 12" EP. Set this one in stone.

4: Big Balls - Dwarves
This one's from Hell Ain't A Bad Place To Be: An AC/DC Tribute. Listed as the Dwarves. Set.

5: Speed Demon (Download) - Dwarves
Live version - originally available as a download from the Greedy website.

6: Seven Eleven - Earl Lee Grace
Track #9 from Blackgrass. A Blag side-project. Set.

7: Meth, I Hear You Calling - Mondo Generator
This is the opening track from their 2003 album Drug Problem That Never Existed.
Side note: This band is fronted by Nick Oliveri (Kyuss, Queens of the Stoneage). Mr Oliveri also plays in the Dwarves under the moniker 'Rex Everything'. Set.

8: Who Put the Methamphetemine? - Brad Cook
That's what all of the internets say. I'm not gonna argue. Another Dwarves member.

9: One Time Only - The Holograms
Track #4 from Night of 1000 Ex-Boyfriends. Cover of a Dwarves song. Set.

10: The KKK Took My Baby Away - Cool Millions
The Dwarves cover the Ramones under the pseudonym 'Cool Millions' (for some unknown reason).. Originally released on the 2003 Ramones tribute Song Ramones the Same. Set.

11: This Jihad - Blag Dahlia
Sounds like it's just Blag with an acoustic guitar. All listings I've found list this one as such.

12: Dominator (Radio) - Dwarves
Radio version of their track from The Dwarves Must Die.

13: Want You Bad (Remix) - Dexter Holland
The singer from the Offspring doing what sounds like a Backstreet Boys cover - In full boy-band glory. I have no idea what this is or where it's from, but everybody seems to agree that the listing belongs to Dexter.

14: Shit's It - Sgt. Saltpeter
Another track from an occasional Dwarves member. Fecal-focused country ditty that everyone credits to (or blames on) the Sargent.

15: FEFU (Clean) - Dwarves
Another track from The Dwarves Must Remix 12" EP. Set.

16: Blast (InstruMental) - Dwarves
Instrumental version of the song from The Dwarves Must Die.

17: Take Me To Your Leader - The Desert Sessions
Blag's contribution to Josh Homme's musical collective. Originally appeared on Desert Sessions Volume 6. I don't have the original of this one, but this sounds like a studio re-recording. Blag's definitely singing on this one.

18: Killa Cali - Get the Hater
Not 100% on this one, but I'm pretty damned sure that this is the hip-hop side project of Blag, DJ Marz and Luke Sick (Get the Hater). The interweb agrees.

19: Down By the River - Dwarves
Originally off of the 1993 Anybody Out There single. Set.

20: Don't Hate Me - Elmo Webber
So sez the internet.

That's what I've got, and it's good enough for me (for now). The maddening thing about this is all of the absolute dead-ends I chased in trying to flesh this one out. Of all of the bands listed only a few really fit. Persephone's Bees was a total nothing - The only Coyote Ridge I could find was a golf course - KEZF is a fucking radio station - And I couldn't find one damn thing on the Fursmen.
Oh well.

Summer Tee-Vee Update

John From Cincinnati
First off, I've been reading web-rumors that HBO is paying off bloggers to create positive buzz for the show. I'm highly offended that I never got that offer.
That being said, bloggers have just surpassed bored housewives, preteen girls, and congressional staffers on the gossip front.
I genuinely like the show, and if Home Box Office is dolling out the green they should feel free to provide me with an "artist's grant" via PayPal to dclies(at)gmail.com. Please?
Yeah, that'll never work, but I felt it was worth a try.

This is my one and only "must see" show on the air right now. Five episodes in, and I'm ready to throw out my original speculation: "John" is the messiah.
I had the feeling from the start, but wasn't ready to call it until now. I've been intrigued by this particular "what if" scenario for a while now, and even wrote a short story about it last year. Needless to say, I'm hooked.

The show is excellent, and if you haven't been watching it, you should.

Other
I'm digging the Showtime series Meadowlands, but the story-arc needs a shot in the ass. Hopefully that'll happen before the end of season one.
Flight of the Concords is a fun little show, but I'm not 100% sold on it just yet.
I'm totally psyched for the second season of Dexter this September.

That's just about it, except for the excessive amount of Cubs games I've been watching on WGN this year. I've already watched more baseball this year than any other season I can think of, and we're just past the break. I need a fucking job.

Quote of the Day

From Scalzi.com:
"The problem with using the Web as a model for what's really going on is that on the Web, Ron Paul is a presidential front runner and Serenity is the greatest science fiction movie ever made."

Flickr in the Front

I just posted up another batch of photos on my Flickr page - Some old, some new.
I went down the street to Silver Spring, MD today and got a load of great pics. I'm especially fond of this find:Apparently, Carl from ATHF lives in the neighborhood. I never knew.

L&E Record Geek Public Service Listing #3

M.O.T.O. Demo Cassetes (Part One)

The band Masters of the Obvious (MOTO) has been around for well over 2 decades now, but most of their full-length releases are really hard to find demo cassettes. Paul (from the band) has started to transfer those cassettes over to CDRs, and some of them are available from their website, or at their live shows.
Needless to say, it's fucking impossible trying to track down cover art or track-listings for these releases.
Obsessive-compulsive record nerd to the rescue! I have about half of these CDRs - Here are the track-listings and album art for those:

ST. JOHN THE BASTARD (2000)Tracks:
1. Birthday Present To Myself
2. Primeval
3. Piano Jazz Radio
4. How Come He Gets To And I Dont
5. Now
6. Choking On Your Insides
7. Wise Words
8. Worm In The Sky #2
9. In Your Mind
10. Its Easy
11. Top Of The World
12. Stay At Home
13. Guess Again
14. Big Emotional Life
15. Something To Pass The Time
16. If Nobody Else Will
17. Looking At The World Today
18. I Walk
19. Till We Blow The Speakers Out
20. Girl Girl Inhale
21. Black Girl With Blonde Hair
22. Elaine Get Off My Mind
23. Dance Dance Dance Dance Dance To The Radio
24. Magazine
25. Lovers Landfill
26. But Of Course
27. Blast Of Silence
28. Love All Over The World
29. No Way Street

TERRAMOTO (1998)Tracks:
1. Riding On A Bus
2. Do Elvis For Me
3. Hard On Rock'n'Roll
4. Spit On The Sun
5. When Do We Get Paid
6. I Think Of You And I Die
7. Here Comes My Heart
8. Underneath An Awning In The Rain
9. We Are The Rats (Orig.)
10. Overtime Express
11. It'll Be Me (It'll Be Me!)
12. The Saturday Guy
13. Deliver Deliver Deliver
14. She Said She Said She Said
15. I Know You Gotta Do
16. Radio Wall Of Phlegm
17. I Am A Bomb
18. I'll Be Right There
19. Close Enough
20. Corner Of My Eye
21. River Of Death
22. Rock'n'Roll All Day
23. Catamaran
24. Only Love Can Heal The Pain
25. 1822

GANGWAY FOR MIRACLES (1997)Tracks:
1. All Set
2. Spinning Globe Spinning Planet
3. World Of Fuzz
4. Birthday Present To Myself
5. 2-4-6-8 Rock And Roll
6. Hey What House Does The Whore Live In
7. Let’s Nail It To The Moon
8. She’s Gone Nuts
9. Worm In The Sky #2
10. In Your Mind
11. I Walk
12. Blow The Speakers Out
13. What’ll Happen When The Noise Goes Off
14. Looking At The World Today
15. I Just Wanna Go
16. If Nobody Else Will
17. I Hate My Fucking Job
18. Some Thing
19. Girl Girl Inhale
20. Someone’s Gonna Get Their Head Chopped Off
21. Suburban Fighting Crest

AMPEG STUD (1996)Tracks:
1. Gagging On The Edge Of Love
2. Choking On You Insides
3. Wise Words
4. Meet Me By The Flagpole
5. The Things We Said And The Things We Did
6. Doing The Things We Want To Do
7. Making Love For The Rest Of My Life
8. Everyone You Meet
9. Benighted We Stand
10. Used Underwear
11. I Won’t Give Up Until You’re Mine
12. Cincinnati
13. Blazing Speed
14. Always
15. How Come He Gets To And I Don’t?
16. Now
17. Heart Of Hearts
18. Magazine
19. I Wanna Get You On
20. But Of Course

E PLURIBUS M.O.T.O. (1993)Tracks:
1. I'm On Your Side I'm On It
2. Straighten It Out
3. It Tastes Just Like A Milkshake
4. Everybody Knows
5. Cubbyhole
6. Live On The Edge
7. I Wanna Stick Myself
8. Go Straight To Hell
9. Cancer In My Dick
10. Twilite Zone
11. Transformoto
12. Floating On A Cloud Of Love
13. I'm Not Feeling For You
14. Dreadterror Horrorterror
15. Fate Takes A Stool
16. Annie-Claude
17. Reading The Book Of My Life
18. Hot Stuff Poop
19. Original Party Savior
20. Last Supper
21. Mike Tomeny - King Of Kings
22. Upramp Of Your Love
23. I've Never Been To Me

MOTOERECTUS (1987)Tracks:
1. Motoerectus
2. Leo Buscaglia Evening
3. Man Woman And Child
4. Bright Sunshiny Skull
5. The Sorrow And The Pity
6. The Queens Dick
7. One Good Dose Of Nyquil
8. I Can’t Get By Can’t Do It
9. Anatomical Gift Statement
10. Whistle Through Your Ears
11. Die Tonight
12. Fuck Tonight
13. Screwed Up Situation
14. Just The Kinda Guy I Am
15. She Got Everything
16. Price of Love
17. Motodemo

BOLT (1986)Tracks:
1. Dick About It
2. Boredom In Action
3. California In The Summertime
4. Do You Remember
5. I Brake For Spades
6. Big Black Boots
7. Sometimes I Get The Feeling
8. Catholic World
9. Month Of Sundays
10. Destroy The Earth
11. Astronauts
12. Social Scene
13. Walk Don't Walk
14. Duty Child
15. Killer Shrews
16. Bending Over Backwards
17. I Fell Ill
18. Veterans' Day
19. Sickle Cell Express
20. Buckingham

TURN YOUR HEAD AND COUGH (1985)Tracks:
1. Art School Beach
2. Well Dressed Man
3. Give Me Food
4. Do The Dip
5. Midnight At The Guantanamo Room
6. Brain Trust
7. Beat The Beef
8. The Razor’s Edge
9. Supermarket
10. Uptown Square
11. Soul Mass
12. Prefabricated
13. Penisenvypogostyx
14. Every Day Of The Week
15. The King

That's it. Once I track down the other 9 'cassette' CDRs I'll put up Part 2. Look for it sometime in the next five years or so.

What I'm Listening To - Summer 2007

Hooray! The Summer 2007 WILT is here.
This is the 8th one I've done, and last WILT of Series Two. In observation of this questionable milestone, Here's a quick 'What I'm Listening To' retrospective.
Series One
Fall
Winter
Spring
Summer
Series Two
Fall
Winter
Spring
Summer (the post you're reading now)
Was Dick Van Patten right? Is eight enough? Well, I'll leave it up to you blog-monkeys to decide.
If you want 'em, I'll keep making 'em. If not, I'll probably still make 'em, but just squirrel 'em away in my attic. That'll learn ya.

Cover = Photoshopped Picture of The Girl + Background Photo

Liner Notes:
1) Chixdiggit! - Brunette Summer
from the 1998 album Born on the First of July
I cut this track from the last Summer WILT just so I could use it to lead off this one. It was worth the wait.
2) The Riverdales - Look Me Up
from the 2003 album Phase Three
Ben (Weasel) Foster, Dan (Vapid) Schafer, and Dan Lumley rock out another awesome track off of their third LP.
3) The Dwarves - Fuck 'Em All
from the 2001 album How To Win Friends and Influence People
This track is a re-recording of the classic track from the 1991 Sub Pop album Thank Heaven for Little Girls.
4) Snuff - Arsehole
from the 1998 album Tweet Tweet My Lovely
I'd like to think of the preceding Dwarves track as my theme song, but (in all honesty) this one falls much closer to the true mark.
5) Against Me! - Bastards of Young
from the 2006 tribute We'll Inherit the Earth
I picked up this Replacements tribute for the Drag the River track, but am diggin' the whole disc. This is a great cover from Gainsville's finest.
6) Armchair Martian - Truce
from the 1997 Self-Titled release
Okay, it's official: Drag the River is dead and gone. The up-side? It looks like Armchair Martian is back and touring. Woo-Hoo!
7) The Falcon - Feed The Monkey, Drown the Worm or Goin' Home
from the 2004 album God Don't Make No Trash or Up Your Ass with Broken Glass
This is a great track from the debut EP of an indie-rock super-group featuring members of The Lawrence Arms, Alkaline Trio, and Rise Against. Go Chicago!
8) The Queers - Brian Wilson
from the 2007 album Munki Brain
I was gonna put a Beach Boys track up on this one, but then decided to go with a Queers track named for the wayward singer instead. It works for me.
9) The Verve - The Drugs Don't Work (Demo)
from the 1997 import single The Drugs Don't Work [#2]
Blame my old D-Town roommate Sean for the occasional Brit-Pop track that happens to pop-up on my comps. Here's a prime example.
10) Cop Shoot Cop - The Queen of Shinbone Alley
from the 1995 import single Any Day Now +3
One of my all-time favorite b-sides. This one is way out of print, and the only link I could find for it looks kinda sketchy.
I dare you to click it... or are you chicken? Bawk, Bawk, Bawk.
11) Wiseblood - Grease Nipples
from the 1991 EP P.T.T.M.
Yet another J.G. Thirlwell project. If you liked the Foetus, Steroid Maximus, or Manorexia tracks, you'll probably like this one to. If not, go to hell.
12) Electric Six - Rock & Roll Evacuation
from the 2005 album Señor Smoke
Here's another Electric Six track to sexy up your summer.
13) Calliope - Last Caress
from the 2005 compilation Mean it Man
A touchy-feely emo cover of a Misfits song. How could I not include this?
14) Fuckemos - Wimpy Band
from the 1997 album Celebration!
I've really wanted to include a Fuckemos track on one of these comps for awhile. They always got bumped. It just so happens that this one fits perfectly right here. Lucky you.
15) Nami Tamaki - Wasurenaikara
from the 2004 album Greeting
I tried my damnedest to keep this off the last handful of WILTs, but finally caved-in and stuck it on this one. I LOVE this song, but it is cheesy as all hell. It's a J-Pop techno interpretation of "Twinkle, Tinkle Little Star".
This song will be stuck in your head like an errantly shot rail-road spike for months to come. I'm sooo sorry.
16) The Copyrights - Stuck in Summertime
from the 2007 album Make Sound
A perfect summertime track from the brand-spankin'-new Copyrights album.
17) Beatnik Termites - I Don't Wanna Hang Around
from the 1996 album Bubblecore
This is one of my all-time favorite warm-weather crusin' around town bands. One part Beach Boys, one part Ramones, and one part Alvin & the Chipmunks. Awesome.
18) Teenage Bottlerocket - So Far Away
from the 2005 album Total
Once the Lillingtons disbanded, most of the band members went over to this one. This is off of their first full-length.
19) The Methadones - Far Away
from the 2003 album Career Objective
I've blathered on enough about how great this band is. 'Nuff said.
20) Naked Raygun - I Don't Know
from the 1985 album Throb Throb
I'm so fucking glad that I made it back to the Raygun show last April. They've been in heavy rotation since. Here's an old one.
21) Dillinger Four - Super Powers Enable Me to Blend in With Machinery
from the 1998 album Midwestern Songs of the Americas
Ditto. Same show (as above), different band.
22) Turbonegro - High on the Crime
from the 2005 album Party Animals
While looking for a link for this album, I realized that the Turbonegro boys have a new album coming out and should be touring to promote it.
Trust me, it's one show you won't want to miss. Those motherfuckers are SHOWMEN.
23) Bad Astronaut - San Francisco Serenade
from the 2006 album Twelve Small Steps, One Giant Disappointment
For the most part, I had this comp set over a month ago, but had a hell of a time squaring the end. It kept going long and the end never seemed to mesh. At the last minute, I pulled a couple of tracks and threw this one (off of the last album) on. Perfect.
24) Jason Webley - It's Not Time to Go Yet
from the 2004 album Only Just Beginning
The damned comp still went long - This one cuts off, but you're not really missing anything except for silence, a couple of bell tolls, and more silence. Feel free to add that in at the end with your imagination.
---
Yeah, it's been a busy week and I kinda half-assed my way through this post. Times is tough, deal with it.

You all know the deal by now. Here's the breakdown:
- These are actual 'hold in your hands' CDs (just like there were before iPods)
- It's free, yes FREE
- I'm only doing 50 of these
- It's first come, first served
- To get one, shoot your MAILING address to dclies(at)gmail.com
- Enjoy

Woot Alert

Today's Woot is an Archos 40GB Media Player for $200.
I have the 80GB version of this, and can't say enough good things about it. If you're in the market for a MP3/Media player, I'd highly recommend this. Beats the tits off of some fruity-ass iPhone any freakin' day of the week.
This player is one of the most versatile gadgets I've ever had the pleasure of laying my filthy mitts on. It's totally DRM-free and there are loads of great downloadable hacks for it available online.
If you pick up the docking station for it you can record from any standard device with an AV output into MPEG4 format. I've transferred a bunch of crap from old VHS tapes and emptied out my Tivo cue using this thing. Then if you want to keep the files after you're done with 'em you can just drag & drop them onto your hard-drive.

Right now on my Archos I have about 250 full WMA format albums, 10 full-length movies, about 50 various TV episodes, and a butt-load of high-res JPG photos. I fucking love this thing.

Drawbacks:
- Proprietary plug (Why can't everyone just use USB? C'mon, please?)
- Kinda Bulky (You get a great picture and tons of memory, but you're not gonna slip it into your pocket)
- Docking Station sold separately

The Final Fucking Straw

I spent all of Thursday getting the new WILT ready to go - I had about 1/2 of an hour's of work left on it when Drinky Joe asked if he could quickly use the computer to check the bus schedules before he went out.
After he went back downstairs I went to finish and found a black screen - the whole fucking system had locked.
It took me three fucking hours to figure out what was causing it and isolate the problem. It was some trojan malware program from a porn site downloaded under his user account back in April (when I was back in IL) that just decided to "bloom" and blow everything to hell.
Luckily, all of the internet/word files I had been working on were recovered, but all of the graphic work was shot.

I was still trying to unravel the whole fucking mess when Drinky stumbled home from the bar just after 2AM. He hit the john, wolfed down a couple of cheese blocks from 7-11, and promptly crashed out on the fucking couch and began snoring & coughing up a storm (like this).

I chewed a Valium, took a couple of pictures for his Flickr page, went back to trying to figure out how to fix the computer, and turned up the music in a futile attempt to drown out the din. That didn't work. After about a half-hour, I woke him up, explained his precarious situation, and told him to go the fuck to bed before I was tempted to shoot him.

Drinky Tonight

He got up, hit the bathroom again, ate another couple snack-packs of 7-11 cheese, and proceeded to crash right back out on the upstairs couch. Fuck.
I decided to take a leak before dealing with Drinky round II. I sidled up to the terlet, took a step onto the rug, and SQUISH. There was urine everywhere - soaked into the rug, down the wall, pooled all over the tile, down the inaccessible cracks where the linoleum meets the wall, all over the seats... EVERYWHERE.
This wasn't the first time that had happened.

I fucking lost it. I ran over to the couch, grabbed him by the shoulders and started to scream and shake him like a can of hardware-store paint. I'm not sure what I said - All I can recall is that he was terrified, I was so angry that I was drooling and spitting with every single syllable, and that a pool of foamy saliva was collecting in Joe's left eye-socket.
I threw him off of the sofa, declined his offer to clean up his mess (ie: use 3 rolls of paper towels to drunkenly spread his urine all over the greater upstairs region) and marched him downstairs with explicit instructions not to show his face upstairs until tomorrow (for his own well-being).

What scares me is that I really wanted to hurt him - make him break and bleed. Thank Christ for that Valium.
I've had my own regrettable messy nights, but with Drinky it's almost EVERY FUCKING NIGHT. I just can't fucking take it. Something has to fucking change.

It won't.
---

Addendum: Due to this evening's Drinky Joe fiasco the Summer 2007 WILT offering won't be done until later this weekend, or early next week. Everything's still fucked, I'm covered in Joe urine, ready to down my first drink of the evening, and call it a night.
Try and stop me.

Happy B-Day Mr. Dan

Big burfday loves goes out to our beloved Bud man.
If you know Dan, you freakin' love him. It's impossible not to.

Go Cubs!

I'm gonna be out at the game tonight (and possibly tomorrow). I'll be in good seats, decked out in Cubs gear, and drunk so there's a decent chance that I'll show up on the WGN.
Look for me... On second thought, please don't.

Update: I WILL be back there tomorrow on the 4th. Continue to avoid WGN.

Drinky Joe Learns A Lesson (Sorta)

It's been awhile since I've been able to do a Drinky Joe update. That's good.

I've made it perfectly clear that I'm fed up and he has just as much of a chance of getting shot with the Springfield Arms .45 Auto as he does with the Panasonic Lumix FZ5 whenever he passes out on the sofa. He's taken the hint, but sometimes the bourbon just gets the better of him. Like in the shot above when he was just too tuckered to get out of his boots and into his slippers (laid out at his feet). Cute.

Now the Drinky Joe page is like a fine "true barrel" whiskey. Sip it down, enjoy it in moderation, and no one gets hurt.
Drink in the liquor-soaked goodness HERE.