Monday, September 01, 2008

Lies, Lazarus, Lies!

'Lies and Exaggerations' has been stuck under a 6-foot blanket of e-dirt for the last 2 months, but now is clawing back to the surface with bloodied vengeful fingertips for another deep breath of sickly-sweet internet air.
God help you all.

In the last 2 months I've been in 9 different states, traveled over 3,500 miles, rescued The Girl from the Potomac cesspool, moved 12 metric tons of worthless shit halfway across this country, and have relocated to the one (non-Muslim) city that has more bullshit "government knows best" laws/ordinances than DC - I'm talkin' about Chicago ("Help me, I'm being oppressed"), Illinois.

I've got a new fortified stronghold, some fortified wine, a bunch of stories, a few new things that are pissing me off, and all the time in the world.

We're back in business, folks.


Prairie Dawg said...

Eets alive!

Gunderstorm said...

Oh you bastard! Don't think for a second that I didn't catch that jab!

I figured out where I heard that statement and it was (your father's beloved) Don and Roma's show on WLS: "Reason Magazine, the periodical for libertarians and "independent" thinkers, released an article stating that Chicago was the most oppressive, nannying city in the nation. How did they make that determination? Why Chicago? What's wrong with us? Jerry Agar will speak with Radley Balko of Reason this morning at 9:30 - tune in to WLS to find out!"

While Reason does not use the term "oppressive", Agar dropped O bombs aplenty.

Welcome to the neighborhood. I hate you.

DC Liar said...

I'm totally with you (and the Reason Magazine guys by proxy), Gundy.

We will rise up against the totalitarian overlords and smoke foie-gras out of .45 revolvers while running yellow lights through traffic-cam intersections.
Damn them all straight to hell.

Chris B. said...

That's all fine and pretty - just make sure you get a Star Trek ear piece for your phone. Also, smoke outside. Also, if you hate Chicago, spend a few days in Nashville. That'll fix your wagon.

DC Liar said...

I LOVE Chicago.

That's why I'm so pissed that Blagoffbitch and all of his candy-assed compatriots are trying to suck all of the fun out of it.